it was a snowy day in st. louie, mo... the day an ambulance drove beth and baby unborn downtown to barnes hospital. 5 weeks early didn't sound too bad, but the whole thing was definitely scary. we didn't even get to finish our lamaze class. how would i handle that transition thing and all the rest? the smaller hospital didn't want to risk anything with the storm coming. in case something special was needed, they wanted us to be in the best place possible.
we would later find out that our doc was ranked 4th in the nation for dealing with high-risk pregnancies. that's good. so the induction began. beth's bp was too high... pre-eclampsia... only cure was to deliver the baby. 5 weeks early... maybe small, but no big deal.
okay, so how long does it take for a forced dialation? this is getting hard on beth. transition? this is transition? i didn't know what to expect, but i'm sure i'd never heard stories like this from any friends. this is scary. rather than becoming animated and agitated, beth was becoming listless. why do i feel like i'm losing her? i have to yell at her to keep her focused and from passing out, but the nurse says i'm doing great.
finally the delivery room! it's a girl!!! can't see her yet... something's wrong. 2 nurses and 2 pediatricians from next door children's hospital work feverously next to us. the room is eerily quiet. it's now 7 minutes and we've heard no cry. nothing. the OB asks, "is she going to be alright?" the reply, "we don't know yet." a nurse comes in the room and says that the doctors are needed next door. they refuse to leave. i snap pictures frantically, wondering if these will be the only pictures of our little girl... alive. the doc asks for a name. beth says... jennifer margaret.
9 minutes... a wee cry. a wonderful cry. "She's going to be fine." really? really? how can that be? an apgar of 1 when she was born. now she's a 9? thank you God!!!
on the phone calling family and friends... it's a girl and she's okay!!! 4lbs.-4oz. not bad. she's beautiful and... wait, i hear beth screaming in the other room, gotta go. i run to see what's going on just in time to watch a flurry of staff pushing her bed frantically into another room. what's going on? in short, "it could be one of 3 things" the doc said. "2 of them are fatal and one isn't... and we know it's not that one." what are you saying to me??? all i can remember next is going to the premie ward to hold our new little girl while they ran tests on beth... thinking... wondering what it would be like to raise our new little girl... alone.
what a day. and it was only the beginning.
but they were wrong - and 18 years later beth and i face new challenges with our "little girl"... our wonderful daughter. but at least we get to face them together.
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