17 years ago i had a birthmark removed because i thought it may have changed shapes a bit. "no biggie"... said the doc. and even when it turned out to be melanoma... it was caught at such an early stage, no further treatment was required. "just get yearly skin exams and a chest xray from a dermatologist."
and i did.
but a couple summers ago i noticed a lump in my right armpit that didn't go away. i didn't think much about it until it seemed to grow a bit larger. i happened to have an appointment coming up with my dermatologist... so when i saw him, i mentioned it. "that's nothing. don't give it another thought," were his exact words.
a month later when my yearly physical came around, i thought i'd show it to our family doc... and mentioned what the derm doc said. aaron tends to be pretty cautious and extremely thorough... so i still didn't think much about it even when he suggested we have it removed "just to be sure."
but nothing prepared me to hear him say, "it's melanoma" when he called me after the surgery. i had been expecting lymphoma or something like that at the worst. but melanoma hadn't crossed my mind. however, since our daughter had been treated for stage 3 melanoma when she was 8, his words stabbed a cold knife deep into my chest. even though she's doing great today, i knew all too well the implications.
after 2 more surgeries, they thought they got it all, and started me on interferon therapy. just like my daughter, i began making daily trips to ann arbor for the 3 hour infusions. the regimen starts with a month of those, followed by 11 more months of home injections three times a week. but a pet scan at the end of my month showed that the cancer was already back, still in my right side.
i had another surgery, but the doc said he was unable to get it all. since the cancer came back so quickly, they decided the interferon wasn't doing the trick and decided to go a different route. my surgical oncologist considered me now to be in stage 4 (incurable, and usually terminal for melanoma patients), but my oncologist said that even thought this is "advanced", it still hasn't moved beyond the initial region. so he considers me to still be stage 3.
he then recommended i start a treatment that consists of 5-6 days in the hospital where i'll get a cocktail of 3 chemo drugs and 2 bio drugs followed by 2 weeks off to recover.
the first round was more unbearable than i could have imagined. but after my doc made some adjustments, the second one went much much better.
i finished the max number of treatments they could give me of this therapy... and was i ever glad it was over. i started a long recovery process with scans every three months. scans right after treatment were promising, but inconclusive. there was no clear evidence the cancer was there, but they couldn't say that it was gone for sure.
i was on a "leave of absence" from westwinds for several months. the church has been absolutely incredibly supportive and patient. people brought in food to our home 3 evenings each week for several months. that helped so much to keep things moving smoothly at home and takes a huge load off of beth's plate.
december's scan was good, so we agreed i'd return to westwinds part-time in a non-pastoral role until march scans. i'd also see the doc regularly to give him the chance to physically keep tabs on any new growths in my armpit. if scans were good, i'd return to my full-time role.
unfortunately they weren't... so it was off to the hospital for my fifth armpit surgery... thankful that it hadn't spread to another area of my body (that we know of at least). the plan is somewhat in flux at this point, but it looks like i'll have radiation and possibly some systemic bio-therapy after that. so i'm back on medical leave with westwinds. soon i'm sure i'll transition away from the church so they can move forward with getting someone healthy enough to do the job.
G*D has shown himself faithful through it all. and that's not just a little rubber stamp i'm putting on this whole mess. it's the truth. just read my blog. you won't find it all roses though. it's been rough... and i've tried to be honest about my struggles. hopefully i'll continue to be.
(if you want to read posts that are just about this journey with cancer, you can filter the posts to show only the ones that are "medical" by going to the sidebar on the main page and clicking "medical" in the "categories" section. or you can start with the first post about finding out about the cancer from back in december of '06 by clicking this link and move forward from there. either way... happy reading!)
